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How McDonald’s Is a Threat Because You Are Incompetent

July 9, 2010

Preface: This is a recently written article from my personal blog for friends, and so its stance is a bit more aggressive than I would employ for a typical Appeal To Heaven post.

McDonald’s warned: Drop the toys or get sued

“McDonald’s is the stranger in the playground handing out candy to children,” CSPI’s litigation director, Stephen Gardner, said in a prepared statement. “It’s a creepy and predatory practice that warrants an injunction.”

Actually McDonald’s is the recognizable face in its own property and the welcome guest on the property of others via free trade. They are not handing out candy to children, a statement which implies abduction for physical harm such as assault or rape, they are providing incentive for children to prefer their food via the benefit of a toy, much in the same way that other businesses will provide incentive for adults to prefer their food via the benefit of price, or quality of source. This is called marketing, and it happens in even “non-economic” exchanges such as convincing a friend to attend a party with you.

“But multi-billion-dollar corporations make parents’ job nearly impossible by giving away toys and bombarding kids with slick advertising,” he said.

Did you hear that parents? You are spineless, weak, lazy, incompetent persons. You completely and immediately relent to your child’s every whim because you are a non-person. Of course you also have no control over what routes you choose to travel on and thus the exposure to the private property of other individuals who make trade with McDonald’s, and you certainly have no power over how much television they watch.

To quote a good friend, only in a world without adults could such clowns have the audacity to call themselves anything along the lines of The Center for Science in the Public Interest, let alone file a law suit “for” innumerable children who are not their responsibility and who make their own decisions and who have parents to help guide those decisions, and obstruct them as they see fit.

Lets return to that first quote, particularly “predatory practice that warrants an injunction.” This is very strange, in the latter portion we see the CSPI assuming that they have a right to make a call on other people’s personal choices to the point of legal action, a bold move for any group. But predatory? Really? Is it a zero-sum arrangement, or even a negating one? This makes assumptions about the specific food elected at the register, of which there is a wide variety, many of which still qualify for the toy, the motivating factor for the children. That sounds to me like a large potential for a net gain. Is it predatory to provide bonuses now? Is it predatory to offer low interest rates for the first year on a purchase, or free cable tv with an apartment rental? These are all free engagements that people enter into, and last I checked, a predator didn’t ask before they initiated an exchange, in fact it wasn’t even an exchange. This is not predatory behavior, and the entire concept of such relies on two suppositions: that parents are always weak willed, and that children are sub-human.

The Huffington Post has its own advertisement for the lawsuit with a few nuggets (not of chicken) in it:

using everything from TV commercials to signs in windows to the Internet in order to get kids to pester their parents to take them to the restaurant.

CSPI contends that tempting-kids-with-toys is unfair and deceptive–both to kids who don’t understand the concept of marketing and to parents who have to put up with their pestering offspring.

“These marketers are very similar to pedophiles. They are child experts. If you’re going to be a pedophile or a child marketer, you have to know about children, and what children are going to want.”

McDonald’s wants your money–and it’ll manipulate your kids any which way to get it.

The consistent theme is that of weak, idiotic parents who have no autonomy, and of children who are sub-human animals. Then there is the massive stretch that knowing how children think means you are on par with a pedophile, but that stretch comes from the chair of the television and media committee of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, which sounds like he knows a lot about how children think, and has made a profit from that knowledge, thus: pedophile. Yes, McDonald’s does want your money. Businesses do. So does the CSPI, and they make that donation link rather prominent on their site, and their business is convincing you that they are working for you, and for you to provide them with funds for a service far less tangible than even the worst McDonald’s franchise. That is the toy they are dangling in front of you, and that is the sort of person they think you are: gullible, manipulated, and sub-human for the purposes of strict profit, like every child.

Only in a world without adults.

-djq

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